I was blessed to have three children comprising a boy, the first born, and two lovely girls. The birth of my first child was the best thing that ever happened to me as a young newly married woman. To be able to hold one’s bundle of joy was such a blessing, coupled with sleepless nights that fast became a normal way of life. The birth of my two girls was like putting the icing on the cake because I had always wanted to have both boys and girls. Two little girls and a boy running around in the yard made motherhood really worthwhile.
Motherhood taught me a lot of lessons that I would never have learnt had I not had children. The first one was sharing my love with all of them in equal portions. While I had given birth to my son as a working mother, I had my daughters as a university student, furthering my studies when they were both very young. This experience taught me to be organized, to learn to balance all my roles of being a wife, a mother and a student. It was not an easy task but it had to be done because I had made my choice.
Taking them to school was both a pleasure and a challenge because we had to co-ordinate our time to get ready and leave home together to be on time for school and work. The return journey was more stressful as I sometimes had to wait for each one to finish their extra-mural activities then head home. However, this was the best time for me to be told how each one’s day had gone, imagine three little people competing to be heard. It was quality time and I always looked forward to fetching my children from school and sometimes going for ice-cream just to give them a treat.
One thing I loved was celebrating my children’s birthdays. I really went all out to spend and give them a real celebration with friends and some family members. Each time I had to be conscious to balance what I did for each one of them.
One of my highlights was traveling with my children for holidays. Everyone would be so excited and pack their bags, including their favorite toys to play with while away.It was such fun and that is when their dad and I learnt so much about their characters and sense of humour. It also gave me the opportunity just to play with them, run and walk together and just spend time together away from the usual schedules.
Motherhood also gave me extra worries as I had to worry on behalf of my children on their first day of school or when they had to compete for a sporting or other school event, including writing exams. It was also the same experience of anxiety I went through even when they were older and had to leave the country for further studies.
One thing I learnt about motherhood is the belief by each child that I was an expert in everything . To them, I was a doctor, a cook, a mechanic, a teacher, a problem solver for everything. Each of my children expected me to have an answer to all their problems and sometimes I felt overwhelmed.I had to learn to deal with each child’s highs and lows and still remain sober and composed.When their team did not win a game, I had to commiserate with them had to commiserate with them, when they were selected to a leadership position or achieved good grades, I would celebrate with them. I would feel very proud and walk tall as if it was my personal achievement.
Motherhood taught me to be loving, patient, forgiving, supportive in all situations,and to be brave.With three children around me, I learnt to listen more than talk as each one wanted to be heard.Motherhood came with a lot of responsibility. I realized that I had to show the way, teach the right values about life, including taking the children to church to learn about their faith and visit relatives. I had to ensure that my children had a good education, enough to eat, to clothe , had good health and were immunized, and had a good home. I had to advise them about friendships that were good for them too.All these functions of motherhood taught me to love unconditionally, and to cherish my family. I enjoyed seeing my children happy and did all the things that I could wish for them.
Motherhood also taught me to recognize the differences in my children and to love them despite the differences. It also taught me to pray because when my children became teenagers, I needed God’s wisdom to cope with the challenges associated with these beings. I learnt to laugh, cry, play, trust,enjoy and relax with them. I also got to have new friends through my children’s friends whom I learnt to embrace as mine. I learnt to be humble as my children did not always excel in their endeavors.
I would like to conclude by saying that motherhood is a profession that one qualifies to do without the certificates or studying, but through experience. It doesn’t end no matter how old children get. It is a lifetime job. I would never exchange motherhood for anything else.
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